Self portrait-Covid Days

This painting is a self-portrait of how I felt during the COVID lockdown. I felt like I was in fragments, pieces that I had to hold together just to get through each day. The soft green tones reflect the silent, empty streets I watched from my flat’s windows—once lively but now eerily quiet. Combined with the foggy gray skies of England, they created a heavy, isolating atmosphere.

Being away from my family in Turkey added to the weight of those days. The worry and distance made everything feel heavier, and the fragmented shapes in the painting mirror that emotional state—scattered and struggling to stay connected.

My face, partially hidden within the flowing, ribbon-like forms, reflects that feeling of being lost in a blur of emotions. But the eye you see remains steady, observing everything quietly, processing it all.

The muted palette of teal, gray, and earthy gold reflects a blend of calm and sadness. The colors bleed into each other, blurring the lines, just like time and reality felt blurred during those months.

This painting is a reflection of how the world felt borderless and uncertain, dissolving the familiar and forcing introspection. It asks: How do you hold onto yourself when the world around you feels like it’s falling apart, and will you be able to piece yourself back together when it’s over?